Monday Weigh In and Easter Reflections

Good morning darlings! I hope you all had a FANTASTIC Easter weekend :) I got to spend lots of time with my family. The food was amazing (of course) and I ate a ton of veggies. Woot woot! I also got 2 good C25K runs in this weekend! One on Friday night and one last night. My water intake has been the suck as of late. Not a pretty picture..

So.. As always, it's my Monday morning weigh in!! Yeah buddy! I was really anxious last night about weighing in today. I worked my butt off last week and was really hoping to have some success to show for the effort... And boy did I!! Not only did I drop the 3 pounds that I gained, but I dropped 6 additional pounds!! 6!!

YES! Almost in the 250s!!!

This brings me to a total of 30 pounds gone! 30!! Holy cow!

I'm excited! 30 pounds... I never ever thought I could do that..I haven't taken any pictures yet, but maybe today. I finally got a new mirror for my bedroom, so I can see.. I'll do a before and after in the same outfit, just to look at progress.

Part of my post today is Easter reflections... Sundays are a little rough for me.. Sundays were the days that I would always spend the day with James. Now that we aren't together, I haven't been keeping the routine. It's difficult. Very difficult. I haven't established a routine for myself on Sundays yet, so the sadness seems to be able to whack me over the head when I least expect it.

It's more of a loneliness than a sadness I suppose. I surround myself with amazing friends and my supportive family, but sometimes it's not enough. I miss the companionship that comes with being in a relationship. However, I have no immediate plans to be in a relationship any time soon. It's time to focus on me. I need to be a little selfish at the moment and learn to love myself. How can I love others if I don't first love myself?

I've never been a relationship jumper... I had a string of short term BFs in High School, then I was single for 3-ish years. Then I started dating the butt and was engaged to him for nearly 4 years. Broke that off, single for a few months then started dating James. Broke that off about 1.5 years into it. It seems that in my adult life, I'm tunring into one of those jumpers. I don't want to. I don't want to jump. I want to be happy and single and not have to share my blankets or worry about someone other than Molly. I don't want to be tied down to one person right now. I want to date, meet people, go out and shamelessly flirt, shamelessly flirt with the AV maintenance guy that visits me in the library. I love being single...

At least he won't steal my blankets... Bastard...

But I miss it... I miss the attachment. I miss the feeling of closeness. I miss having someone to harrass at all uungodly hours of the day and night. Sure, I have friends. I have the greatest friends on the face of the planet. I constantly talk to them. Hell I'm sure there are days that they want me to STFU and GTFO. It's different though. Having a significant other is different than just having a friend.

It really sounds like I want to have my cake and eat it too... (Tangent: Who in the hell came up with that saying?? Doesn't it make sense to eat cake if you have it?? Who wants cake to go stale? What am I supposed to do with the cake? Look at it? Seriously...) I want the security of a relationship with the freedom of singledom. I'm a complicated woman...